Sleep

Sleep used to be something I took for granted. As a teenager, sleep was easy and I could sleep until noon without a problem. In my twenties, I don't even remember falling into bed most nights...a toddler will do that to you. Now, as a thirtysomething, I find sleep elusive some nights. I toss and turn on any given night, but sometimes, I just get up...knowing sleep will not come to me soon. Usually it is because I am stressed or thinking about something, but sometimes it is just a function of poor sleep habits in my twenties that are catching up to me now. I could not sleep tonight. I woke up about 2am and knew I wasn't falling back asleep. Granted, this time I did have many reasons to keep me awake....holiday events, my child's upcoming birthday, holiday shopping, bills, family feuds, etc. Funny how during the day, any worries can be rationed away, but at night, they seem to come alive. I never thought of myself as a worry wart. I used to pride myself in solving my problems instead of mulling them over and over in my mind. Unfortunately, some problems or life circumstances don't allow for easy solutions and are out of my ability to control. I wish my brain had a "sleep mode" button. A simple little button that I could push as I climb into bed that activated a complete brain shutdown. Of course, this assumes that it would automatically re-start my newly rested brain after the full 8 hours..or 6 most nights. For some reason, my mind works the best at this time of night and I usually accomplish alot...for example, posting to my blog. However, I miss sleep. I miss falling asleep and not waking up until my body tells me to wake up. I miss the clarity that comes from a good night's rest. Ah, sleep, it is something this thirtysomething is going to try to do again right now...